Well, it's the last day of the year 2006. What do I have in mind? Nothing much. I just got an email from my god mother and it was really nice of her to invite me over to New Zealand to work. Ahh...that would definitely be a great experience for 6 months wouldn't it? But unfortunately I already got a job here in Malaysia. I'm still going on with my plan to work for the most a year and then by hook or by crook I'll get the money to get my tiny tushy here to the UK for my degree! Even if it means robbing the bank! Hahahaha....yeah rite...but I'll really work to get my hands on a scholarship or a loan for sure.
Talked to dad yesterday night about...what else? MONEY MATTERS! It seems like that's the only thing we talk about anyway. It's really sad. ok lets detour a little here on the subject. I've learned alot ever since I started college in KL. Things that I manage to expereinced which I won't if I was studying here in Malacca. I felt like my life just started then. Then I realised I was so overlyprotected. There's so many things about life, more accurately the REAL WORLD I didn't know about. I've always wanted the best...the best in class the best in this and that...but when I was in college I felt to small...cos the best I know was the smallest or tiniest thing in the REAL WORLD...sad isn't it? The fact that I learned all that alone...without my family beside me. I really don't know, probably I'm borned in the wrong era, or wrong world, or simply I was borned as a mistake? So back to the subject, so I came up with the subject about how much i have to keep aside every month for utilities and rent and stuff like that. Asked him if it was a better idea if I shift to somewhere nearer and stuff. Which at the same time would make things easier and cheaper...he didn't realise I was just asking for an opinion instead assume I was just asking for money. How sad can my life ever get? In the end he decided to pay for rent each month and I don't have to worry about it. Then that's it...i walked off the room...sigh...can this ever be mend? I don't want a dad I can only talk MONEY with I want a dad who can be supportive of what I'm doing and for the future plans I have in mind, a dad who can give me advice and opinions, a dad who will be proud of my achievements...to be there during my graduation. I wonder if that's just too much to ask for.
I've got a really nice and proper family. I know alot of my friends who come from a broken family. Which makes me want to appreiciate my own more. But then sometimes i feel like I'm not any different from those friends of mine...in fact at times I feel like I'm worse. They still have a really good relation with their parents...They even have 4 of their parents excited about going for their graduation...what do you know about that? I guess I'll try writing him a letter and then send him an sms from now and then and make things work...I will always have to take the first step...cos eventually no one will...wish me luck =)
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