Hello there everyone! It's been erm a very very long time since I last posted something here eh? I've been posting on erm my MSN blog...so didn't want to do 2 blogs at a time...I don't see the point. Anyways, I hardly blog much just didn't find enough time and stuff like that. =) What a lame excuse but that's the excuse I choose to use =) haha
Things have been erm the same I should say. Maybe not for some but to me I'm still the same old me doing the same old thing. A semester had end and a new one is here...so basically I'm halfway through my forth semester. Yeap...as always it's getting busier each day...oh I find myself more hardworking than I usual...like not putting work to the very last minute and stuff like that. I also don't go out that often anymore...I just don't see the point...You know to have to pay to go out and erm not having that much fun that you expected...
I just come to realise that I miss my friends back in high school. I'm erm kinda a loner back then...I only have a few friends but really good ones...like Lii, Les, Ron, Jack, and some others...Sad to know that you can never get friends like that now here in college. Anyway, I'm also a loner here... In fact I actually enjoy the time alone... It's just great, you know what I mean? I mean like seriously there's no one I can really trust here...cause I've been hurt like so many times and it's just so scary to take the risk again.. so being alone has it's good and bad...you don't get erm companionship except for urself but then again it's great to be alone and knowing that no one would hurt you. Though at times I really wish there's someone I could hug or you know to be loved by someone...I don't mean love as in BF love but love as in friendship or family...but then again...I keep reminding myself that there are people who love me...it's just that they are not here and that they are far away from me physically but certainly not mentally...like paul, my cousin in Canada who loves me so much! It's just great to know that someone loves you. Oh and not forgetting my god brother who care for me so much...he's the only person here that I can trust and rely on at the moment...=) I can't imagine what I'll be without him...thanks Ko! Love you so much! MUAKS MUAKS! hehe. The person I turned to basically like everyday.haha...
Sometimes I wonder why are people out there trying to get me? What have I done to erm deserve this? sigh...I just wish that they would stop...but then again who am I? I don't have such powers...I'll leave it to my angels to do that work. =) I'm sure my angels will guide me and protect me from any danger... at the moment I just wanna be alone and take care of myself...I just don't want to be hurt anymore...I don't need anyone...If I had to choose, Ko...you'll be the one I choose...seriously...I'll never choose them over you! It's a stupid thing to do if I did that. So no worries ok? And make sure you don't leave me too...or else...I think I don't wanna be here or in this world anymore...it would be less meaningful....or meaninglesss....
I'm missing my Russ boy and Oj and Harry and Ben at home. I wonder what are they doing at this very moment...I wish I can have a dog here to play with or to love...I don't mind a cat!! Haha...I'm that desperate to have a pet! Can you believe it? But why not? I love animals so whatever it is I'll be as happy...but obviously my favourite would be a dog right? =)
I'll be going to Kuching next weekend for a trip...it's a assignment for my Design this semester...I wish mum could be there with me or my god brother...but well it's time to be independent now...haha...like I've never or something...But well I'm sure I'm going to have a lot of fun there...=)
Tmr there's 2 site visit to go...boy it's gonna be a very tiring day tmr...thank god that the day after is a weekend!! yay! seriously need the time...i mean to rest for a while..things are getting more and more hectic...it's going to get worse...so i hope i'll be able to get enough rest and stuff =)
okies I think i gotta make a move...need to take a shower and erm some nap...then start with my work again...weirdly I have this 'can't wait to start' feeling...OMG! I'm totally in the mood hahaha...but well hope it will last long...I have to be more determind with my thoughts then my feelings at the moment...or things will go wrong...wrong wrong wrong hahahahahha yeah...I just hope I don't fall for him anytime soon...it will be a total wreck if I do...I cannot repeat the same mistake again...but then again...if it's just for fun...hahahah i don't think so the last time I thought that was fun ended up to be a total MESS!!! anyway, lets forget about that and get on with work...=) see ya soon....hahah i hope =)
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